Thursday, February 23, 2006
ok why in the world do i have time to blog like a few hours before the most difficult SPA out of all the 3 sciences that i'm taking? coz i'm printing the model answers frm the blackboard to wel,l can kao. there's nothing for me to memorise except the format. and since i've screwed all my phy spa so far wat more is 1 more. erm but its the onli skill A there is. i'll try but the outlook ain't good.

anyway skill CD for both bio and chem's over. i guess both were ok. i mean after the SUBTLE hints frm people who took before that. hahaha well so i haven't been feeling depressed after every paper like i always am for exams. except today when i reached home i was depressed. i had just finished my piano and i was feeling totally dejected. at my state of preparation how am i supposed to sit for the exam? i'd probably fail again =( the thing i'm angry about is i've been working and practising but why is it i make no progress. argh. and with the totally screwed up common test thats gonna take place i won't have time to practise. how many mroe weeks? errr 2?! i can't play staccato for scales. i can't play arpeggios. i can't do the staccato for my 1st song and my teacher says the way i play makes the song sound very scattered, like there's no idea of the song. the 2nd piece i can't do the cross hand part. but my teacher says its the best out of the 3. and my 3rd piece i can't do tempo rubato properly. my teacher says i completely change the tempo. oh man i'm some loser. oh well watever. i've slept pass my depression. time to study for skill A.

oh ya another thing bothering me is that my left eye has been constantly swollen and itchy for the pass week! and its always after i wake up. no i don't use renu contact lens solution nor any baush and lomb (if thats how u spell it) products. why i duno. this time it really feels like an infection. coz sometimes when i get up the eye is so covered with the fluid that i have to pry it open with my hands. oh wat is with this year and my eye!!! tell me. i've nvr had this problem before for the pass 3 yrs i've been wearing lenses!!! izzit coz my lenses are too old? haiz!

health, study, piano. what a bother. time to mug HARD for Skill A. hopefully the nxt time i update abt a wk later i'd be in a pleasent mood =(

ok why in the world do i have time to blog like a few hours before the most difficult SPA out of all the 3 sciences that i'm taking? coz i'm printing the model answers frm the blackboard to wel,l can kao. there's nothing for me to memorise except the format. and since i've screwed all my phy spa so far wat more is 1 more. erm but its the onli skill A there is. i'll try but the outlook ain't good.

anyway skill CD for both bio and chem's over. i guess both were ok. i mean after the SUBTLE hints frm people who took before that. hahaha well so i haven't been feeling depressed after every paper like i always am for exams. except today when i reached home i was depressed. i had just finished my piano and i was feeling totally dejected. at my state of preparation how am i supposed to sit for the exam? i'd probably fail again =( the thing i'm angry about is i've been working and practising but why is it i make no progress. argh. and with the totally screwed up common test thats gonna take place i won't have time to practise. how many mroe weeks? errr 2?! i can't play stacco for scales. i can't play arpeggios. i can't do the stacco for my 1st song and my teacher says the way i play makes the song sound very scattered, like there's no idea of the song. the 2nd piece i can't do the cross hand part. but my teacher says its the best out of the 3. and my 3rd piece i can't do tempo rubato properly. my teacher says i completely change the tempo. oh man i'm some loser. oh well watever. i've slept pass my depression. time to study for skill A.

oh ya another thing bothering me is that my left eye has been constantly swollen and itchy for the pass week! and its always after i wake up. no i don't use renu contact lens solution nor any baush and lomb (if thats how u spell it) products. why i duno. this time it really feels like an infection. coz sometimes when i get up the eye is so covered with the fluid that i have to pry it open with my hands. oh wat is with this year and my eye!!! tell me. i've nvr had this problem before for the pass 3 yrs i've been wearing lenses!!! izzit coz my lenses are too old? haiz!

health, study, piano. what a bother. time to mug HARD for Skill A. hopefully the nxt time i update abt a wk later i'd be in a pleasent mood =(
Saturday, February 18, 2006
so today i ponned interact to go home and study and up till now i've onli moved abt 3/4 topic of ionic equilibrium (IIb). damn bad lah. ok but i took an afternoon nap and technically now i'm supposed to go and mug my ass of with photosynthesis and respiration waiting but i just went to check out my SATs scores. so lousy =( really lousy. below 2000. ok but i don't think i'll be using it. its just its disappointing eh? hahaha but i didn't study i can't expect much. oh wells yeah den i started trying to check out US university requirements of SAT scores but they onli state HIGH scores. ahh watever. oh but some of the campus for the universities are like WOAH!!!!!!!! damn nice and high tech. haha.

den was just chatting with xa abt SAT s and she told me Mr Boy flooded her mail and i just realised all his mail have been sitting in my junk email for quite some time. hmm. hhahaha. den was just reading through some of the mail ppl sent like a million years agao which i haven't read. some i find rather meaningful. hmm..

so do dreams really reflect what ur thinking of? and if so do they come true? nah i don't think so. com'on, reality's harsh and it sucks. oh well, haiz.

so we had band this morning. and Mr Tan was taking sectionals of perc with piano. i guess it was ok. he didn't like scold all of us or something. i think its time i start getting serious with my practises. i'm like already so lousy yet i don't practise hard enough. haiz. u noe sometimes i really don't understand things. some things are just hard to phantom.

k i shld really better get going. just wanted to blog some things down. anyway is the yellow too glaring? tag ur opinions.

and i walked away with doubt and uncertainty. illusion.
Friday, February 17, 2006
haha i've finally gotten down to adjusting the template a little here and there. yar wat i did was actually to just change the picture of the template and the colour of the fonts and took away the links. haha but it looks totally different frm the old one. but i'm giving credit to the designer by still including her name. hahaha.

ooh many days i feel like blogging but i just simply can't find the time to. haiz. recently i just feel like blogging. but that onli means i'm thinking abt stuff. eh? hahaah man chatting online just killed my train of thoughts abt what i wanted to blog abt.

vday's gone. well vday's techincally friendship day to me. i thought and i reflected. some things i'd rather not remember coz i hate the feeling that comes with it. guilt. sometimes its just thinking why did i do those things i did. find myself stupid and rash. but its over. i've thought through it and i'm happy now. media freedom that comes with blogs? but sometimes i feel like i have to think twice before typing what i really feel. haiz..

well events that happened after friendship day just made me slip into a thinking and reflecting mode. i mean mostly about things that does not concern me. i'm bothered. seriously bothered how come things are the way they are. why? somebody enlighten me. tell me is it the case with everythign that happens with life or is it some isolated case. den i start thinking was the way people reacted correct? or should we have thought through the consequences carefully? again this leads to being rash. haiz.

ponned S paper lecture on thursday to study. in the end after i thought i passed my afternoon nap time, i reached home and slept for 2 whole hours with my notes in my hands and my spectacles on my face. and it was some deep sleep. i'm tired. mentally, physically. that day set me into more reflecting. got a little disturbed. but its been like that ALL the while i guess i just did not see it from another point of view. oh well, nothing that concerns me i should just ignore it. hahaha

jcs such a short period of time. too short to foster really close friendships. too short to get angry with each other. harmony.

i think this is a weird entry. i'm weird. was rather hyper during physics tuition today. i've been rather hyper today and yesterday. WHY AR WHY? hahaha i'm hyper yet i'm bothered. it doesn't go.

common test sucks. if i get 4As i promised to treat jj to SCOOPZ and if she gets 4As she'll treat me. looks like finally after those numerous treats, 1 is finally coming MY way. HAHAHAHAHAHA.. lets set a target. C average. means i need 1 B for maths for the conditional S. 1 C and the rest can be D. i think i have a 30% chance of achieving my target looking at the rate i'm going. PERFECT. k so i better be off! NOW. hahaha
© 2004/2007 qian. all rights reserved.